Michael Phelps gets stoned

Feb 02, 2009- Permalink

Britain’s News of the World paper released photos of Olympic champion Michael Phelps sucking back on a bong at a party. With millions in endorsements at stake, the gold medal pot smoker’s people tried to drag him out of the deep end by having him release the following statement:

“I engaged in behaviour which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment. I’m 23 years old and despite the successes I’ve had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again.”

What won’t happen again? Getting caught? Letting photos get taken as he gets stoned? Obviously the guy realizes that he needs to make cash quickly while people still care so he has to pretend this was a one-off youthful error and he’s still worthy of being on a Wheaties box.

Who knew his 12,000 calorie training diet was just a massive case of the munchies.