Evans Above

I want to wish all of you a safe, happy, healthy and prosperous 2006. May the best day of 2005 be the worst day of this year.

Just did a whack o’ Xmas shopping with Amazon. Click, click, sit, wait. No lines. No pushy people.

Damn that was easy.

When two cheerleaders from the NFL’s Carolina Panthers start a brawl in a Tampa bar after getting caught having sex in the washroom, you not only have a news story, but also a pop culture phenomenon.

Late night comedians, news channel pundits, and bloggers have all weighed in on the case of Panthers TopCats Renee Thomas and Angela Keathley. The pair angered female patrons of the bar who had to wait for the bathroom stall to become free while the pair allegedly had sex in their. When confronted by the women afterwards, Thomas became physical.

The pair have denied that any sexual conduct took place. Peter Anderson, Thomas’ attorney, said that “This was an unfortunate incident which has generated numerous rumors and inaccurate facts. Miss Thomas denies all allegations of any sexual conduct.”

Thomas, 20, has been charged with assault, giving a false name (she had another cheerleader’s ID) and causing harm to another. Keathley, 26, has been charged with disorderly conduct and resisting arrest. The’ve lost their jobs with the Panthers for violating the team’s code of conduct and Keathley has also been let go from her day job as a nurse. Of course, this story wouldn’t be complete without the rumour that Penthouse is wooing the pair for a spread.

Delving into the mailbag we find a new DVD that hits the streets on November 8th. Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical is a Showtime movie version of the off-Broadway musical that parodied the 1936 film that extolled the dangers of marijuana. Starring Christian Campbell, Alan Cumming, Kristen Bell and Steven Weber, the film also features appearances by Ana Gasteyer, John Kassir, Amy Spanger and Christian’s younger sister, Neve.

The film’s comedy is broad, the dance numbers are a blast and the acting features more ham than a deli. Still, for a goofy, campy diversion on DVD night, Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical fits the bill.

Wow. Trump just fired four members of the Excel team. He then said, “Life continues” like he was a tuxedo-clad Dalai Lama. Or Yoda with bad hair.

Funniest moment had to be the fired foursome trying not to crack up as they squeezed into the back of the cab.

I just saw porn princess Paris Hilton’s topless Vanity Fair cover and two thoughts crossed my mind:

• Her fifteen minutes are so over that we should start charging her overtime.
• She’s looking more and more like her mother…and that’s not a compliment.

And now back to reality…

News photos of looting in New Orleans show an interesting bias from AP and AFP. Apparently one race “loots” while the other one “finds”.

Kudos to Bob Costas for not hosting Larry King Live on Thursday night. The show was supposed to be mostly about the case of Natalee Holloway, with a little bit about the conviction of BTK killer Dennis Rader.

Costas said that, “I didn’t think the subject matter of Thursday’s show was the kind of broadcast that I should be doing.”

I don’t mean any disrespect to Holloway’s family. Obviously the event is in their lives 24/7. In national news terms though, it was news when she disappeared, perhaps news on major breaking evidence, and of course news when they find her alive or dead. The constant hours of pundit speculation on Fox and CNN only serve to sensationalize the story. Of course, sensationalizing crime stories is the opiate of the masses and keeps their attention off things like politics and policy.

The mailbag was heavy with goodies this week and one item in particular had me reaching for the Frosted Flakes.

Rhino has released a new DVD, Saturday Morning with Sid & Marty Krofft, which contains seven pilot episodes of Krofft’s live action Saturday morning series.

• H.R. Pufnstuf, the trippy series that followed Jimmy, his magic flute, and Living Island’s mayor, H.R. Pufnstuf as they tried to keep out of the clutches of the evil Witchiepoo.

• The Bugaloos. I had absolutely no memories of this show which featured four British teens as singing fairies. The show featured Martha Raye as Benita Bizarre.

• Lidsville: The evil magician Hoo Doo (Charles Nelson Reilly) ruled over a land populated by talking hats. And you thought we had to worry about sugar in our cereals.

• Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: Starred Family Affair’s Johnny Whitaker as Johnny Stuart, a boy who befriends Sigmund Ooze, a sea monster banished from his family for being insufficiently gruesome.

• Land of the Lost: A father, two children, dinosaurs, Pakuni and Sleestaks. What more could you ask for?

• The Lost Saucer: Ruth Buzzi and Jim Nabors played androids Fi and Fum.

• Far Out Space Nuts: Bob Denver and Chuck McCann are two NASA commissary employees accidentally shot into space.

It was a blast going through the DVD. Shows like Lidsville and H.R. Pufnstuf hold fonder places in my mind than some of the shows, but all of them knock the dust off some of the Saturday morning memories. The DVD has some fun extras including Lidsville commentary by George Lopez, and interview with Krofft producer Si Rose and the KSAT — Krofft Saturday Aptitude Test.

We also received copies of two soundtrack CDs. The Shield: Music from the Streets presents some of the tracks from the FX network fave. A gritty cop show deserves some gritty music and this CD features tracks from Theory of a Deadman, The Black Maria and Master P. Fans who love the show’s feel will love the tunes that give it its mood.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith was a forgettable film that left me a few hours after leaving the cinema. The Mr. and Mrs. Smith soundtrack features tunes that will stick in the memory far longer. The disc features songs like “Love Stinks” from The J Geils Band, “Tainted Love” from Soft Cell, and “Mondo Bongo” from Joe Strummer and The Mescaleros. Quite a few fun tunes on this CD and definitely more fun to listen to than the movie was to watch.

Tara Reid, the party girl/actress/punchline now hosting E!‘s Wild On… says that she “bumped into” Paris Hilton and fiancé Paris Latsis while taping her premiere episode. Gee, like that wasn’t planned.

Tara says that, “There are just certain people you know you’ll always have fun with, and Paris is definitely one of those people.”

I think that having those three Nobel winners together has to define a perfect vacuum.